Slow Motion in the Shower
July 18, 2007
You ever noticed when you’re in the shower and something falls, shampoo, soap, facial cleanser, whatever, that you’re very slow to catch it from falling? Something always seems to fall in there, and it’s always such a huge hassle to pick it up, you know? And yet, when we’re out in public, with our phones, or ipods, drinks, food, etc., we react with the quickness of Flash Gordon to ensure nothing falls…why is that?
What about the shower causes us to just stare at falling objects in slow motion without any thought of catching it in mid-air? I mean, when my shampoo slips off the side of the tub, I’d rather take a master level college Calculus 4 test, blind while being beaten by a Russian soldier who is simultaneously tickling my feet with a feather, than bend over and pick up the bottle. It literally, and physically, can ruin my day, for some reason. Sure, if I spill a glass of soda on the floor, I’m not too happy about it, but I’ll pick it up and clean it and attend to the stain on the carpet, but if my soap falls 4 feet onto the slippery tub floor, I assume the fetal position and cry my eyes out. (hyperbole)
And by the way, did the shampoo bottle inventor and the bath tub inventor get together one day and decide it would be a great prank on the world to design a tub and shampoo bottle that could never coexist? Have you ever tried that bathroom-balancing act that goes on when you are trying to find a place to set the shampoo bottle down, while not trying to sting the crap out of your eyes as the Johnson & Johnson slips ever-so-slowly down, it doesn’t fit anywhere!! And even if you do get it to delicately balance, you spend the rest of the “shower experience” fearing bumping into any wall too hard because then it will fall, and then you’ll be back to what I was talking about above: the shower pickup.
Dear Companies,
Either make a skinnier shampoo bottle, or extend the edges of bathtubs so we, the consumers, don’t have to worry about picking up fallen shampoo/soap bottles.
Sincerely,
The Consumers
